Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Hump Bike- Taking a Giant Hump or Dump

For $95, is this Old Skool Giant Too Cool?   
By: Rolling Hall


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What's dressed in red, sports a perky rack, and shifts smoothly?  Up for purchase is a Giant MTB that appears to have seen little use in its hometown of Sprawlsville, UT.:

Its manila-mo owner probably rode it around the cul-de-sac once, explaining why this ferrous frame hasn't returned to base elements. It's an LBS-notch above 80's-department store quality, and for close to the same price, after taxes, you could buy this four-and-a-quarter star POS. So, with that monstrosity as a gauge, would you hump this Giant, or dump it?:

At first glance, the NICE NICE NICE upright riding position might look tempting. It'd provide a lucky cyclist with a commanding view of populated streets. But, unfortunately upon further inspection, the quill stem is mounted at a ready-to-snap height. We'd advise lowering it a bit, unless you'd prefer an impromptu introduction to Terra Firma (no, not the exotic dancer you perv). That's a quick, costless fix, and the rest of this red-sled doesn't appear to need any more coin tossed at it to get going on your first Giant adventure.
Inside the ad's beehive-edjumacated listing, the seller claims this bicycle is 'weighting' for a person who loves 'out doors adventures.' We're pretty sure he intended to type outdoor adventures. And given the undeniable reliability and serviceability of thumb shifters, a Shimano drivetrain, and cup n' cone hubs, we wouldn't hesitate weighting the rack with camping gear to spend a weekend exploring the White Rim.:
On the stopping end things, (my God, he didn't mention breaks!) this Giant pile piles on mediocre power with a canti front brake and rear U-brake. While it's adequate stopping power to cruise rail trails with your most precious possession rolling along in a child seat, that stealthy U brake hidden under the chainstays wasn't a high point of slowing ATB's. Early mountain bikes favored this brake and location because its low-profile shape provided ankle clearance with a shorter actuation cable. Unfortunately, the more powerful, easier-to-adjust, and less affected-by-mud canti's would hang out too far from the seat stays. They'd snag stone-washed jeans and hit rider's calfs and ankles when getting rad -- not cool.
The seller of this particular 'smooth shifting' 21-speed beast (we're willing to bet he hasn't shifted a modern drivetrain yet) claims that massive saddle is brand-spanking new and 'confy' – by which we are assuming he means comfy. And that's a good thing when the only filter between you and your Giant adventures is foam grips and pinner 2in-wide tires.
The price is 'fi,' whatever the fu that means. So, for 19 five-spots do you see yourself leaning this retro-ride outside Alta's Peruvian? (A pair of Black Widow tele skis strapped with used tubes to the rack, of course.) Or is this 'classic' better off donated to the SLC Bicycle Collective to fulfill its two-wheeled talent fetchin' forties and blunts from a corner mart?

You decide!
Hump it: That's a NICE NICE NICE price!
Or
Dump it: That price is Fu…


See the poll on right sidebar

4 comments:

helena said...

We are very certain we are selling is good,dependable,vehicles and are proud of our Previas.


US preiva dealer

Unknown said...
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Unknown said...

Hey it's 2018 welcome to the future! This post is hilarious! I just picked up a blue Chinook for $10. Everything works and tires still have new nubs showing. Looks 80s to me from the rad logo .I say buy this but talk down the guy to $60 . Anyway who knows where this red Chinook went to...

Rahul kumar said...

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